There are many types of soul mates, from romantic soul mates to soul families to kindred spirits. That said, twin flame relationships aren’t necessarily about love, and it often requires a great deal of inner work for two twin flames to make a partnership work. According to Spinelli, there’s a common misconception that twin flames are supposed to “complete” each other—which can lead to an unhealthy dynamic between the two, as people are supposed to feel complete on their own. While twin flames are thought to be one soul split into two bodies, soul mates are simply two separate souls that are extraordinarily linked. But on top of that, Spinelli adds that twin flame relationships can quickly become toxic, unlike a soul mate connection. “In a twin flame relationship, your twin flame may mirror your own issues, unhealthy habits, or imbalances. In addition, when twin flames are apart, they may have a hard time functioning,” Spinelli explains. “You may also end up defining your self-worth by the relationship.” This makes them great for encouraging growth and awakenings, but again—difficult to make work in the long run. Soul mate relationships are often much more stable, with Spinelli noting “a soul mate is a person ideally suited as a life partner or close friend.” Both are people we deeply connect with, Spinelli notes. “They are both relationships that touch one’s soul at a deeper level.” Both twin flames and soul mates are part of your destiny and often feel like home, according to spiritual author Shannon Kaiser. “When you meet your soul mate or twin flame, you feel like this is a person you are destined to be with. And you feel you can be yourself around them,” she previously told mbg. “This is because you’ve known both your soul mate and your twin flame in a past life.” Kaiser also adds that not everyone has a twin flame, and you are not incomplete without them if you don’t. “This is just one path of many to bring you into spiritual awareness and ultimate alignment,” she says. Plus, she adds, soul mate connections aren’t always romantic. When they are, though, there may be a greater likelihood of long-term success for soul mates compared to twin flames. “Twin flames cause personal awakenings but may not be your soul mate,” Spinelli adds. “They come together for divine purpose and balancing out karma,” Kaiser adds. “Soul mates come together for life lessons and experiences.” In either case, these are people you made a soul agreement with before entering this life. “Twin flame relationships can be much deeper and more profound than a soul mate partnership because they lead to wholeness,” Kaiser says—but that’s if both people have done their soul’s work. “A soul mate can be a friend, romantic partner, or family member. Twin flame relationships can be more intense and often come together to work through life lessons or achieve something greater,” Spinelli adds. “Neither is better than the other, just different.” So, whether they’re your soul mate or twin flame, the core idea is that people come into our lives for a reason, whether temporarily or for life. Everyone has something to teach or offer us, as we do for them. And when we continuously focus on our own personal growth, we can show up better for the people in our lives, whether they be a twin flame or soul mate. But just because they’re strong doesn’t mean they’re unbreakable—it’s still important to work on a healthy partnership and your own individual growth. When you do that, the two of you will be catalysts for love, growth, and harmony in each other’s lives. If you believe you’ve met your twin flame or soul mate, but aren’t certain which one, we’ve outlined their differences and similarities above.
