Mirror work is a practice designed to cultivate self-compassion, and it only requires a bit of your time, a mirror, and some positive affirmations. Here’s how to do it, plus tips for getting started. The practice was created by transformational teacher and self-love expert Louise Hay, who authored Heal Your Body, as well as Mirror Work: 21 Days to Heal Your Life. As Hay writes in Mirror Work, she believed “doing mirror work is one of the most loving gifts you can give yourself.” Hay’s 21-day program involves doing mirror work for a total of three weeks in the beginning, noting in her book that after those three weeks, you’ll have begun to plant seeds of self-love in your psyche. So does it really work? Moun D’Simone, a spiritual mentor and meditation instructor, tells mbg she has found mirror work to be incredibly transformative in her own self-love journey. As D’Simone began welcoming a more loving attitude while looking in the mirror, she found “it became this practice of intentionally spending time in front of the mirror, to break free and break through the negativity and self-judgment that comes so easily from conditioning.” While it was uncomfortable at first, she says she was able to learn how to peel away the fears and insecurities and truly see herself and the truth of her heart. And if you’re curious about what the research says, one 2017 study on mirror work1 found it to be an effective addition to self-compassion practices, with the study authors noting, “The mirror enhances the efficacy of this self-compassion manipulation in activating the soothing affect system connected with parasympathetic nervous system activity.” As D’Simone notes, “I felt this sense of deeper connection to myself by being in front of a mirror and looking at myself, my face, looking at my body, and just embracing, loving, and uncovering a deeper sense of kindness with myself.” As D’Simone tells mbg, “Now I actually enjoy looking at myself. It’s like I’m just meeting that little girl in the mirror all over again by way of being with my body.” D’Simone recommends working with affirmations that go beyond physical appearance; for example, rather than “I am pretty,” you could say, “I am powerful.” You want to “incorporate things that feel more genuine and profound, not so separate and judgmental,” she explains. Here are some other positive affirmations if you need some inspo: “Set a timer for one minute and start there—and then a little more,” she says, adding, “And remember, too, that our innate worth is much more than what we see in the actual reflection, and that’s why we stay there looking into our own eyes, to get to the part of us that is innately worthy and loving and full of potential.” D’Simone says mirror work has helped her be able to look at herself and find beauty, contentment, and appreciation. “I kept staying [in front of the mirror] until I could really meet the part of me that was OK with the temporary, transient nature of my body and how things are always changing,” she explains. “Make a whole ritual around it; you know, light some incense, maybe put some gentle meditation or mantra music on in the background,” D’Simone says, adding, “Set yourself up with a mirror and say, ‘OK, I’m ready to meet more parts of me. I’m ready to really be more loving and more appreciative and more tender to more parts of me by way of looking at myself instead of rejecting any part of me.”
