As psychiatrist Anna Yusim, M.D., explains to mbg, the idea of manifestation was popularized by Rhonda Byrne’s book and movie, The Secret, describing the universal principle that our thoughts create our reality. “We are what we think, consciously and unconsciously. In other words, what we attract into our lives reflects the contents of our mind,” she explains. Or as spiritual author Shannon Kaiser puts it, “We are all like magnets, both reflecting and attracting what we hold in our thoughts.” Meaning, if you’re in a negative mindset, that mindset will be reflected back to you in your life—or vice versa if you’re in a positive mindset. “When we put out thoughts of lack and emptiness, we attract more of exactly that: lack and emptiness,” Yusim explains, adding, “When we shift instead to thoughts of sharing and giving, we get the same energy coming back to us.” And this law is actually backed by many psychological theories, she notes, such as Aaron Beck, M.D.’s cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT)1 model. In CBT, you work with a therapist to change your thought patterns, which in turn changes your feelings and behaviors, and thus, you change your life. A good way to remember this is the phrase, “Thoughts become things.” Every action, behavior, and choice is predicated by a thought, so when your thoughts begin to align with a more positive vibration and state of being, you’re better equipped to make choices that align with what you’re looking to manifest. As Yusim notes, manifesting isn’t about deluding or deceiving yourself. “While changing your thinking is a powerful tool for drawing what you want into your life, it is not a replacement for taking the actions necessary to accomplish and attain those very things,” she explains, adding, “Nor should you blame yourself and your misguided thinking if, despite your best efforts, you cannot manifest what you want via the law of attraction.” For one thing, Yusim explains, if you ask the universe for something that isn’t for the highest good of everyone involved, the universe is unlikely to grant your request. Further, if you aren’t specific in what you’re asking for, or don’t really have a good idea of what it will look or feel like, it will be more challenging to bring it into reality. To that end, it’s also important to really believe you can have (and deserve) what you asked for. If your conscious mind is saying one thing, but your unconscious mind is saying the opposite, Yusim says, that’s a common problem that gets in the way of manifesting. And as neuroscientist and author of The Source Tara Swart, M.D., Ph.D., previously explained, journaling can also help you recognize a scarcity mindset versus an abundance mindset—because manifestation simply doesn’t work with a scarcity mindset. Hypnotist and author of Wishcraft Shauna Cummins previously explained that this method aids in manifesting by helping you to consistently focus on what you desire, in order to help your brain “find what it’s looking for and therefore [become] more likely to magnetize your desires into action.” Just remember that you then need to follow up this statement with aligned action toward your goal. According to Kaiser, the first step is to notice how you could be subconsciously resisting love. For instance, she explains, if the universe keeps bringing you unavailable people, this could indicate something within you is still unavailable. So, once you identify why you might be resisting love and intimacy, you can begin the process of working through some of those blocks. (Easier said than done, but this guide can help.) From there, “If would like to manifest a new life partner, tell the people you are close with of your intention and begin to keep your eyes and ears open for how this person may show up in your life,” Yusim says. And remember, the universe has a way of bringing things to us that we may not expect. Try not to get hung up on exactly who or what you imagine this person to be but rather be open to the possibility of meeting someone new. “If you would like more financial abundance to show up in your life, you need to begin thinking thoughts of financial abundance rather than of financial lack. You are even encouraged to start envisioning scenarios that signal financial abundance to you: opening your mailbox to find paychecks for large sums of money, being offered a higher-paying job, eating dinner at a nice restaurant, or whatever financial abundance means to you,” Yusim tells mbg.  The trick, she adds, is rather than thinking thoughts about wanting those things, you can think thoughts about already having those things. (Thoughts of “wanting” are actually thoughts of lack—we want what we don’t have.) “According to the law of attraction, such thoughts attract more lack. In contrast, thoughts of already having are thoughts of abundance, which would attract more abundance. The way of manifesting something in your life, therefore, is to think thoughts of it already being in your life,” Yusim explains. From an abundance mindset, if you would like to manifest a new job or make more money, start telling people you know of your intention, and take aligned action, networking and/or applying for jobs online, she suggests.

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