When you address these concerns, you are told that you are “crazy” or that what you saw and heard isn’t what happened. If this has happened to you, you may be a victim of gaslighting in the workplace. This is exactly what the gaslighter is banking on—that you will keep this person’s behavior to yourself out of a feeling of shame. You may have even convinced yourself that you must have caused this person to act this way toward you. Some people are just saboteurs—they live to see people fail. They mistakenly think that if you fail, they will look better by comparison. They don’t realize that one person failing at the office makes it harder for everyone else, including the saboteur themselves. Saboteurs regularly use gaslighting to accomplish their goals: They will lie to your face (or to your boss) that they never said or did something and that you are known around the office for trying to get other people in trouble (a lie). You’ll find that gaslighters often accuse other people of doing what they are doing. This is called projecting. In reality, your boss asked someone at the office to access your laptop. She may have said something innocent-sounding like, “I need a file from her laptop, and she’s at lunch. She told me it was OK to access it.” This is digital abuse made worse by gaslighting. Beyond just denying what they did, gaslighters will specifically tell you that you are paranoid to plant a seed of doubt in your mind. When you are harassed by an employer, they will usually tell you no one will believe you. Usually, they will throw in a lie that everyone in your office thinks poorly of you. They may also threaten to have you fired. These are threats designed to make you stay silent about the harasser’s abuse. You may even start to question your version of events. This is exactly what the gaslighter wants you to do—not trust yourself to the point where you question your reality. RELATED STORY: 28 Gaslighting Examples + Phrases To Look Out For An attorney, especially one that specializes in workplace rights, can give you legal advice and can recommend what steps you should take to protect yourself. An attorney may also be able to tell you if you have a potential harassment case against your employer. RELATED STORY: 7 Ways To Deal With Gaslighting, From A Therapist
