John Hackston, head of thought leadership at the Myers-Briggs Company, echoes this point, explaining that ENFJs are often so concerned with others’ values, they may try to “correct” other people. “They can sometimes be a little too forceful—and can take criticism very personally, even when a comment wasn’t intended to be critical,” he says. “That said, people with ENFJ preferences may seek relationships where they can grow together with their partner, where they can have deep meaningful discussions about love and life, and where they can organize all that in a way that makes their lives together positive and fulfilling,” he says. Because ENFJs are very future-oriented, he adds they can also have difficulty connecting with the here and now. As such, “a potential challenge for them is communication with their partner in a realistic and practical way, especially if their partner prefers Sensing (S),” Segovia explains. Hackston notes they can also resist difficult conversations because of their aversion to conflict. However, he notes, these folks in a relationship are typically warm and genuinely concerned with building harmony. They’re not ones to shy away from long-term relationships, thanks to their future-oriented focus. “ENFJs are altruists and will support and encourage their significant other to thrive and get their life goals,” Hackston says, though sometimes, they can take it too far, whether by neglecting their own needs or pushing their partner too hard. Overall, according to Hackston, ENFJs want a partner they feel a connection with, who will show them appreciation. “They are likely to find this with other extroverted feeling (EF) types—especially INFJs and other ENFJs, but also ISFJs and ESFJs.” They make enthusiastic, motivated, and empathetic colleagues and appreciate schedules and structured processes in the workplace (and beyond). They also enjoy roles where they can motivate and organize other people to achieve results that align with their values, Hackston explains. Because of their big-picture style of thinking, Segovia says they like to explore long-range, big ideas, as well as environments where they get to share their decisions with others—to make sure those decisions benefit as many people as possible. “These types can make natural leaders and are great team players, keeping their focus on people and encouraging co-workers to make positive changes,” Hackston says. They may feel uncomfortable, undervalued, or even guilty if they feel underappreciated or get a bad review from co-workers, he adds.
