Everything was perfect on paper, making it easy to convince myself and others that everything was fine. Tough, but fine. But there was always a little voice that chided, “Keep looking.” In both situations, I lived out the confusion, clumsily and painfully, until it became clear that something must be done. For me, in both cases, that meant leaving. But before I came to that conclusion, I was hung up on what to do about that “off” feeling. Now that I’m on the other side, I’m sharing five questions that made it a little easier to figure out how to deal when things didn’t feel right, in case they can help you do the same. Take some time to hone in on what exactly it is that this other thing makes you feel, and why that feeling is making you uncomfortable. Talking to a trusted friend or therapist can be helpful here. Start by recognizing your alternatives, whether that’s leaving, voicing your concerns, or altering circumstances. Think about them or write them down in a journal to generate some more perspective on possible next steps that you could take. For my friend, deeply dreading weekdays and crying frequently outweighed benefits, salary, and security. That was my friend’s definition of the cons outweighing the pros. What’s your definition?
